Thursday, June 9, 2011

On Things...

I know I've been MIA for while now, I promise you sometime in the near future I will truly be back. Life has just been a huge stressball. It keeps getting squeezed but nothing is helping.

The most current thing pertains to my job. I've been with my company for the past 3 1/2 yrs. Over the winter we got completely slammed with work. My job is to do estimates and pretty much everything else. We are on a program for Allstate insurance called Alacrity. They are very strict with time limits and things needed for the claim. I've tried my best to conquer the 60 or so estimates that have come in.

Today, before my boss left she came into my office and told me that we were off the program forever. She asked me repeatly if I have been doing the work. That is all I have been doing for the past 3 mnths. I have been trying so hard to catch up. She looked at me and told me we would be losing a lot of jobs. Then she told me that we would also lose a lot of money. This I know.

Immediately after she left I burst into tears. The first thing I thought of was being fired. All I could of is no matter how much I had tried, it didn't matter.

I somehow made it out to the lobby and told ny coworkers what had happened. They assured me I would not be fired. But still I do not believe them. I need this job. I need the money.

I really do love my job and the people I work with. I am behind and it is not completely my fault. In march or so the computer pretty much stopped working. Well the programs I needed did. I told my boss for mnths and she just kept telling me we didn't have money. Finally the problem was fixed but obviously I am still behind.

As well as doing Allstate, I also find and do the folders needed to pay our sub contractors. I pull
Photos off and email them. My boss knows I don't just do allstate. She knows that I do a lot but I still can't help feeling like she's blaming this all on me and soon I'll be out.

She honestly never asked me if I needed help even though I know she knew I did. She would do a little here and there and give the estimates right back to be completed. I'm so terrified that I may lose my job that my stomach is in knots.

I'm the only one besides my boss that works 5 days a week. I also answer the phones and do my coworkers job on Mondays because we are so 'slow' that she is able to work 4 days a week.

I am only one person and I can only do so much. I don't know. I really wish I knew the answer to all this. For now, it's just a wait and see game. :(

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